More Dumb State Laws: Illinois

Time again for more dumb state laws! (along with MY COMMENTS in bold italics)

This time?

The great state of ILLINOIS!!

1. You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
Cash, people! NO credit cards in Illinois...better at least have a dollar on you, or your butt is going over the border! In Walmart in Illinois, maybe the greeter checks your pockets to see if you have a dollar on you?

2. You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
No WONDER all those tollways near Chicago get backed up when I am on them. They just don't want you to drive into the city until they pick up the phone and ask the police first.


3. The English language is not to be spoken.
In all of Illinois? Wow. Who knew? I either have to learn sign language before I go there or I gotta learn a different language. No WONDER I couldn't understand that hysterical guy that yelled something out his car window at me when I was there!

4. In Champaigne:
One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth.
But if you live in Chicago? Oh yeah, go right ahead. Just don't warn your neighbor in ENGLISH first!

5. In Chicago:
Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
Not even if you are in a "fast food" place? Not even if you eat realllllly fast? Not even if it is serving barbecue food? What about if you order bananas flambe? What if you just wanted to roast marshmallows?

6. In Chicago:
It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
Dang. I will just give him a Bud light then. How else do I get to giggle when I watch him stagger?

7. In Chicago:
It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe’s neck.
If you remember, this is also illegal in another state in a previous blogpost. Who knew this was going on in several states and they all needed laws to prevent it!?

8. In Chicago:
It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
Finally...something that IS legal! But Chicago is COLD...so I hope they do this in the summer. Oh, and by the way, should one of us call Chicago and remind them that some 15 and 16 year olds are pretty "hot", so they may want to consider lowering the age here for this one? And what kind of permit does a kid under seventeen apply for to protest naked in Chicago? (oh, probably a BAA) (You know, a Bare Arse Application). What are these kids going to protest anyway? Wearing clothes?

9. In Cicero:
Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.
Not even if you are humming a hymn? Amazing Grace? Geeesh. Maybe they can sing on Sundays on public streets (as long as it isn't in ENGLISH!)

10. In Crete:
It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s dog.
Well, good for Crete. The only city in Illinois where you can't have sex with one's dog. Wait a minute...does this mean in Crete, you can have sex with someone ELSE's dog? Or a cat? And for goodness sake, don't be protesting naked or be humming while you are doing it...

11. In Crete:
Cars may not be driven through the town.
They must have a biggggg parking lot just outside of Crete, then.

12. In Evanston:
Bowling is forbidden.
Bummer. Fred Flintstone would have been disappointed, not being able to go up on his twinkle toes in Evanston. And forget about not being able to wear those cool bowling shirts in Evanston. Snobs!

13. In Evanston:
It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
I don't know about you, but I don't HAVE curtains in my auto. Do you? And why would you change clothes in your car if there was a fire? I know you can't eat in a restaurant that is on fire, they made that clear, but evidently now I CAN change my clothes in my car after that.

14. In Galesburg:
No person may keep a smelly dog.
Well, it may keep all that sex with dogs down, though.

15. In Galesburg:
It is illegal to burn bird feathers.
Especially if they are still on the bird. Woooo-haaaaa! Do they know the stop, drop and roll rule? Maybe THAT is how they named the flamingo... (FLAME-ING-O).

16. In Galesburg:
Jostling others is illegal.
No renaissance fairs there, then. Dang. I really like those big turkey legs and men in tights.

17. In Galesburg:
No bicyclist may practice “fancy riding” on any city street.
Dang gummit. None of that "fancy riding" ya hear? Just drive your bikes straight and for the love of God, don't enjoy it. NO SMILING!

18. In Galesburg:
There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
You can, however, use a tennis racket....they bounce off the net so much better that way.

19. In Horner:
It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer.
I am going straigt to Horner to rob a bank...the police there have slingshots--do you KNOW how long it takes them to reload the rocks into the slingshots? Little town Horner, had a bank on the corner......

20. In Joliet:
Town fathers, reflecting the pet peeve of hearing their town’s name mispronounced ‘Jolly-ETTE’ when all local folk know it’s pronounced ‘Joe-lee-ETTE’, made pronouncing it Jolly-ette a misdemeanor, punishable by a $5 fine.
Now THAT's an idea!!! We should ALL do this....if anyone mispronounces your town's name....just hit them with a fine. Man, some of us would be RICH. You must have etiquette in Joliet!

21. In Kenilworth:
A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow.
How do they inform the roosters? I noticed this was a law in another state before Illinois' laws...they must all have a lot of loud, obnoxious roosters around!

22. In Kirkland:
Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kriland’s streets.
Not only must they have to inform the roosters, but now Kirkland has to inform the bees of this rule. YOU go tell them...NO, YOU go tell them...Not ME, YOU go tell them.
Wonder if they are allowed to march through town in a single line instead of fly over then?

23. In Moline:
Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited.
Pretty safe law there..because Moline must be pretty warm then and its too darn hard to make ice rinks out of the ponds there, then.

24. In Normal:
It is against the law to make faces at dogs.
But sex is okay as long as you don't own that dog. (see the laws above). And what happens if someone DOES make a face at a dog? It's not like the dog can walk into the police station and file a report against you, right? And cats? They are fair game..go ahead...stick your tongue out. Just remember, they have CLAWS!

25. In Zion:
It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, or any other domesticated animals.
I am glad you can't give the animals lighted cigars, because then they won't get lung cancer. And don't give them SNUFF either. I hate it when they drool all that junk out of their mouths at their water dishes! Yuck!!!!

We have a WINNER!!!!!

Last week, I spent all week at Mayo Clinic helping a friend of mine staying there who was beginning her chemotherapy and radiation treatments.

What a fabulous place full of caring people! (More on this later on another blogpost).

While there, I stayed at Hope Lodge, which is a place for cancer patients and their caregivers to stay while they go through weeks of treatments.

I thought: "What better people could I pick than three of these wonderful, brave patients to become judges for my photography contest?"

So I asked three and they were happy and thrilled to be able to do this for me and all of you!

I took them all separately, one at a time, into the room with a computer to look slowly at each and every one of the 11 entries. I stayed silent while they looked, saying nothing and giving no facial expressions to their comments.

Then I asked them to look at all of them a second time and to name their FIRST choice, which they each did. I told them not to talk to the other judges until after I showed all three and they all had the chance to pick their number one photo out.

Then, I asked them if they had to choose a second choice for a picture, which one would it be.

And they told me while they were alone with me. Again, I told them NOT to tell the other judges until we all got together again.

They were terrific.

They were excited to do this for you.

They smiled (maybe for the first time in a few weeks) and it gave them something fun to do other than to think about their situation, their horrible cancers, their sadness.

They enjoyed it.

You can be proud of making their day and giving them joy by your beautiful photos.

Of the three judges' picks...here's how it went down:

TWO of them picked the SAME photo as the winner.

Therefore, we had a winner (because two out of three picked the same top photo).

These SAME TWO judges also picked the same picture as their number two favorite photo, which I found fascinating.

The THIRD judge picked their number two photo as his number ONE photo and the winning photo as his number two photo. (Isn't that interesting too?).

All three judges picked the SAME third picture as their next favorite photo, too.

But, without further delay....

DRUM ROLL PLEASE>>>>>

Here is the January 2010

winning PHOTO

for the theme of:

"Something Rusty"..............

Congratulations to Kim!!!!!

Her blog is called: "A Parent's Life to Behold, Through the Eyes of Insanity and Bliss."

As the winner, Kim will receive a widget button that states she is the Jan. 2010 Photography Contest Winner to display on her blog, and she will automatically be put in the contest as an entry trying for the 2010 winner of the year, (as will all the upcoming monthly contest winners). Because I am NOT good at creating my own button, I have contacted another blogger to do this for me..so it will be a few days before I get it to Kim to put on her blog. But as soon as I get it, she will get it!!

Kim will also get a certificate in the mail showing that she won the photography contest (if she desires to have one from me). She can enter future contests, as all the monthly winners can also try each and every month to win again.

Great job, Kim!

Oh, and the SECOND place winner (which has no prizes to go with it, but an Atta Girl!) was the picture of the chains (click HERE to see the blogpost with it in it) by Judy/SquirrelQueen.

And the third favorite of the judges (which also has no prize to go with it, but gets another ATTA Girl!) was the lantern (click HERE to see the blogpost with it in it) by Jientje.

Once again, I would like to thank every ONE of you that entered the contest...and encourage you to keep entering photos for each month. We love your photos and it is such fun to see what everyone enters.

Yes, folks...your hard earned tax money is paying for stuff like this.....

Every now and then, I like to share some news stories, so that you will remain on top of things and fully informed.

You know, "inquiring minds want to know".....

that type of thing.

So, when I saw THIS news article, you KNOW I had to share it with all of you...

A December National Public Radio report noted that fake houseflies
have begun appearing in urinals around the world based apparently
on research showing that men are more likely to aim at the flies,
thus leaving the area surrounding the urinal cleaner. Another
commentator wondered how such "research" was conducted (other
than by the obvious method of paper-wiping floors around urinals
and then comparing the wipes). [Daily Telegraph, 12-11-09]
[KPCC Radio (Pasadena, Calif.), 12-25-09]

All I can say is:

Men blogger readers, can you PLEASE explain this to us women? Seriously, I really want to understand.

Does it stem (no pun intended) from the old childhood thing about boys peeing in the shape of their name in the snow? Is Freud right? Do women have penis envy? (I know I do whenever we are in the woods and I must balance myself over a log while the hubby (like my digital camera): just points and shoots.

And, who came up with this study? It isn't like a cure for cancer research study, for cryin' out loud...who PAID for this study??? Me and you, fellow taxpayers? Who is accountable for spending money on this?

Because I need to contact them....I have this hypothesis that consuming chocolate while a hunk of a man massaging you for hours makes you lose weight and I gotta get into the control group to try it out.....

Lake Superior Winter Splendor: Part THREE

This is the final installment of a three part series on photographs I took at the shores of Lake Superior about a week ago.

I love open water and ice formations, especially on Lake Superior.

But, in case you are bored with the last two blogposts before this one and want a short intermission first, well....

here you go:

This little guy was on the tree by my house before we left to go treasure hunting for photos on Lake Superior:

And I caught him in a blurry escape, too:

One more shot of him before we go to look at Lake Superior, then, OK?


He got bored about me and was looking out at our lake when we left.

Well, FINE then.

I will just take your fluffy backside then!:

All righty then.

Back to Lake Superior.

I had to take many shots of the red Coast Guard station because it is just so darn nice:

Back to the lake.

It was quiet out there.

But I did see others pulling up to the parking lot and getting out and snapping photos of this little island that day too:

But no one was really noticing the beauty of the surrounding ice.

Silly people.

You gotta look right under your feet!:

I can see how they got distracted, because that Coast Guard station is right next to where you can park your car and go down a tiny path:





That's okay.

I had a date with these ice lava fingers:




Followed by the snowy shores:


And we had a good time together.

It's okay.

My husband knows all about it.

And he is okay with it.

That's how we roll.....

Lake Superior Winter Splendor: Part TWO

This is the second of a series of photos I took on the shores of Lake Superior...if you missed Part ONE, just drop below this post and you will find it there!

I am always mesmerized by ice formations, especially near open water in the winter.

I wasn't disappointed on this trip out to the big lake.

This is a snow covered little island just off the shore. I loved the "dripping" ice formations on the edge of the island:

Snow fingers with ice! Looks like winter lava:

One of the most photographed places on Marquette's Lake Superior shoreline is this red coast guard station:

But in the winter, even the simple frozen shoreline can be gorgeous:

Close up, the shelves of ice have a character all of their own:

These looked like icy fingers dipping into chocolate pudding:





This is a closeup of the one I showed you yesterday of the frozen "hat" over the large stone in the lake:





Looking through lacy trees out at the frozen island just off shore:

Molten ICE!:

A close up of an ice "cave" on the island:

I have one more blogpost to show you tomorrow

to conclude the photographs of beautiful Lake Superior

in the winter....

(at least for this week!)

Who knows what I might find next week????

Lake Superior Winter Splendor: Part ONE

We have had some subzero weather this week, but on the day that I took these pictures, it warmed to a balmy 19 degrees with sun and there was just a little breeze outside.

I took the opportunity to go to Lake Superior's shores (without my boot cast...yup, the Dr. said I didn't need to wear it anymore for my fractured foot! YAY!).

I was hoping the snow and open water would yield some nice photos and I wanted to treasure hunt for ice formations on the shore there.

I found some!

I just loved this frozen "hat" of ice that formed on the top and over the lake stone:

I was concentrating so hard looking for ice formations on the shoreline, that I almost missed

HIM!:

He was just paddling around silently with his female companion on the big lake.

After getting him on camera, I turned back to looking for more ice formations. If you look by the ice, down in the water, you can see a huge Lake Superior stone under the clear water, too:




Ok. Just one more of this beautiful duck and we will move on...

This is looking out at what is called "Picnic Rocks"...which consists of three of these little rock islands. I loved the icy shore too:

Everywhere I looked there were interesting ice formations on the shore:

Even lacy ones:

Another HAT.....ice that covered the huge stones sticking out from the water:

And bumpy ice!:

And stalagtite ice, reaching right into the frozen beach sand!:

I took so many photos there, I had to divide them into more than one blogpost.

Stay tuned tomorrow for Part 2.

Oh Sure, they came to EAT...but I know what they were REALLY after!....

I have had a ton of different birds at our feeder lately.

Chickadees, mourning doves, grosbeaks, redwinged blackbirds, woodpeckers, and bluejays mostly.

They come to eat our yummy smorgasboard of sunflower seeds and seed and suet.

Or so they say...

but I know they are REALLY just there for a photoshoot.

They can't fool me.

They are conceited.

She's saying:

"Well, don't you think I am beautiful enough to get on your blog?"

"Just look at my profile!":

"What exactly do you MEAN: I am not THAT special?":

Wait.

I'll win her over with my talents.

"See? I can balance a snowflake on my beak.

NOW can I get onto your blog?":

"NO. no. Pick ME! Look how I stand out amongst the apples!":

"Oh for goodness sake. You two aren't so special. Now ME....that's another story.

I am one of the few redwinged blackbirds left in these parts this winter. THAT makes ME blogworthy":

"Pshhtt. I am prettier. Look at my ski mask glasses and my yellow coloring against the snow!":

"Isn't that JUST like a male? He's not that special, trust me. I dated him once":

"Well, I have yellow AND red in my feathers, so there!":

So, a conference was held:

"Who do you think WON?":

"We both did!":

And everybody was happy.

They flew off into the sunset:

Until tomorrow's battle at the birdfeeder.....